Neitzche: the wish to will backwards. will back. does that work? can you will yourself anywhere? into anything? what part of you is pushing against what when you will? what muscles spasm and shake and tax themselves? what wall do i plant myself against when i will backwards. is it my face smashed in the brick as i try to press myself back. or am i carving a spinal template into the stone as i use my quads to bury myself into my own history. and what is so wrong with the here, now? this too will be a memory. this will be my backwards some day. will be. will me. will i will myself back here? will i wish to will backwards to this?
and what about a wish to will forward? or is that just fantasy? illusion. imagination. dream? i’ve dreamed this before. i’ve pressed myself into this future once, in some unlit stairwell in the back of one of my minds. the wish to will forward is the ability to stay alive? awake? what is forward? we are always moving forward, even when we wish backward? like tape folding over itself, sticking to itself. wishing backward while still surviving is just sticking to yourself; lint, crumbs, dust and all.